Learn to Connect, Project and Reflect through Mind, Body & Spirit
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Climbing the Spiral Staircase
When describing CPR for caregivers, I like to use the metaphor of climbing a spiral staircase. At times when ascending these coil-shaped stairs, you may feel that you’re walking in circles. You climb and climb, but it seems like you have accomplished very little. Caregivers find themselves at different places on the staircase, and no two places are ever the same. Today you
might be at one place and tomorrow just one tiny step farther. Each step forward, whether tiny or huge, gives you new insights about life and yourself that you weren’t able to see from the steps below. Each step brings you perspectives that will help strengthen your mind, body, and spirit.
Now imagine the circular handrail that leads you up these steps. This spiral guide represents your life experiences. As you climb the steps, you are encircled by the array of your experiences, such as a conversation in the elevator, a promotion at work, the birth of a child, or the death of a parent. Some of these experiences may seem insignificant; others may alter your life dramatically. These experiences wind you through the spiral stairs of life. When climbing the steps you’ll often find these experiences difficult and painful. Yet these difficult experiences provide the only path to growth.
Each difficulty you meet along the way is a gift that is telling you it’s time to connect, project, and reflect again. Climbing the steps can be challenging and exhausting if you’re unaware of how to care for yourself in the process. CPR is a tool for you to use while climbing each step. It will energize you on your journey up the spiral staircase and will help you avoid caregiver burnout. At the top of the staircase you’ll be able to see your life experience in its entirety. You’ll discover a sense of truth, inner peace, and wisdom you didn’t have before the journey began.
Once you start the climb, you can no longer step back or climb down the stairwell. You only have the present moment—the step you’re on and the steps that are in front of you. Each step on your stairwell is taking you to a higher mind-set or consciousness. Although you may think you’re stepping backward, you’re not, because at each new step you have the experiences of the past that have taught you new skills or given you new insights. The spiral staircase is a metaphor for the journey of your caregiving experience. Your mind, body, and spirit all need CPR support as you make the challenging climb up this staircase.
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What Is CPR for Caregivers?
Everyone knows what CPR in the medical world is—cardiopulmonary resuscitation. Chances are, you’ve taken a CPR class. You may even have used the technique to save someone’s life. But now it’s time to learn about another kind of CPR, one you can use to help revive yourself.
CPR for caregivers is a set of principles for healthy communication. By communicating with yourself and with others in a healthy manner, you can avoid burnout and gain energy to care for a loved one who needs you. Caregiver communication is based on three simple principles: Connect, Project, and Reflect (CPR).
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Step 1: Connect
Giving effective care depends on establishing a mutual bond with the person for whom you’re caring. This bond is built on trust, acceptance, and respect. The necessary foundation for developing this bond is connecting with yourself.
| Step 2: Project
The way you communicate with others (what you project), whether verbally or nonverbally, can enhance or obstruct the connection. Be aware of what you project so that the connection remains strong.
| Step 3: Reflect
Your positive or negative thoughts (reflections) determine how you project to others. Learn to keep your reflections positive.
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By using these principles, you will have the energy to become your own renewable resource. Having an increased level of energy will allow you to respond appropriately to the daily decisions you have to make for your loved one. Having an abundance of positive energy will also attract the right people into your life who will support you in caring for yourself and your loved one. Each of us has many circles of support—family members, friends, doctors, nurses, social workers, and others. As the trust in these relationships grows, we form strong bonds that hold us together and sustain us in the toughest of times.
Making connections is critical for every caregiver, but before you can make a strong connection on the outside, you have to make a connection on the inside. You need to be connected to your own mind, body, and spirit. Connect with your mind by giving it opportunities to be pleasantly
stimulated and refreshed. Make a connection with your body by getting exercise, good nutrition, and adequate sleep. Find ways to make a connection, including developing a relationship with your Higher Power. These are just some of the ways to connect with your mind, body, and spirit that I’ll share with you in this book. Once you’ve connected with yourself, you’re ready to
use the tools of projection and reflection to connect with others.
Remember the last movie you went to? On the screen were images that evoked your emotions. What you saw on the screen made you feel good or bad. At the back of the room was a projector that was casting these images onto the screen, stirring up your emotions. Your life is much the same as a movie. The way you express yourself to others is your screen, and what you reflect upon most is sent through the projector and becomes an image on the screen. You can use your screen to empower people and help heal them, or you can use your screen to abuse and suppress others.
As a caregiver, you want to convey self-confidence to those in your care and to others around you. Among the ways you can project this self-confidence are smiling, making eye contact, showing enthusiasm, and listening attentively. These verbal and nonverbal projections
of yourself represent how you see yourself and what you reflect on. What you reflect upon most is what you’re going to project to others, either consciously or unconsciously. You have the power to control both negative and positive thoughts. You can learn to take charge of your thoughts, rather than let them control you.
In particular, people like people who like themselves, so thinking positively about yourself will make it easier for people to be around you and give you support. As you ascend the caregiving “staircase,” good communication results from the way you connect, project, and reflect. Take time to put Caregiver CPR into action, and begin to experience the joy in caregiving.
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Get a signed copy!
A CAREGIVERS GUIDE TO ACHIEVING LIFE BALANCE AND SELF-RENEWAL
CPR for Caregivers uses Grant Watkins’s personal journey as a caregiver to teach communication skills that reduce the risk of burnout. Through a career in human services providing housing to seniors and people with chronic physical and mental disabilities, Grant has discovered strategies that help achieve life balance and self-renewal. His lessons will help you assist, encourage, and nurture family, friends, and people in need.
| | “CPR for Caregivers is a book to carry you through your journey of caregiving. Grant Watkins offers a book to help you gain strength and to move forward no matter what challenges lie ahead. It lets us know that we are not alone and that others who have gone before us can show us the way.”
MAUREEN REEDER, PRESIDENTNational Multiple Sclerosis Society, Minnesota Chapter
“A person caring for another is one of life’s greatest values. We will all face the role of caregiver to someone close to us. CPR for Caregivers is a wonderful road map to thrive and empower yourself through the physical emotional and spiritual journey of being a caregiver.” DR. JAMES ACKELSON, CLINIC DIRECTOR Care Chiropractic Health & Resource Center
“This [book] is a great help to caregivers. It offers a holistic approach – mind, body spirit – to taking care of yourself as you take care of others.”
MOST REV. VICTOR H.BALKE, RETIRED BISHOP
Diocese of Crookston, Minnesota
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